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baby there's no other superstar you know that i'll be your paparazzi
X_anyotherway_x 27
hi aww im happy for both of you good luck nice pics… -
baby there's no other superstar you know that i'll be your paparazzi
Sugar_xxx 26
I'm having problems with Kiwibox right now too - m… -
baby there's no other superstar you know that i'll be your paparazzi
PhoenixFlame87 24
Hey Kati I am really happy for the two of you!! … -
help!
SatansGift666 21
think about your insides!!! -
help!
Essencexofxtear 23
I agree with the post below saying maybe you should…
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|| happily ever after isnt free but id pay anything to have it ||[rimg=img.photobucket.com/albums/v45/preteefairee6/masks.jpg][/rimg]
||||||||||||||||||||||||| I'm not a "drama geek"... ...I'm a Stage Princess ||||||||||||||||||||||||| I'm back, finally. Sorry my little absence there, but I was super sick. Thursday, around 2 am, I started throwing up constantly and didn't really stop until, like, 8:30 am. Then the rest of the day I was just really tired and queasy and ick. So I obviously stayed home. Had a fever of 102* which definitely sucked. Then Friday I stayed home and had beyond a migrane of a headache, it was so awful. And my chest and everything was really tight and sore. My fever went down to 100*, but that was still pretty icky. I was just glad I wasn't throwing up anymore lol. Today I'm feeling semi better, but I'm still not quite myself. I still don't have much of an appetite or much energy. I basically can only sit in one spot and rarely move. I gotta work on fixing that. Fever and everything is gone, though. Only thing still lingering around, besides lack of appetite and energy, is the tightness in my chest. That's pretty annoying, I can't lie. But at least I'm getting there! Today was definitely interesting. Max came home for the weekend and today he came over to get his stuff back from me. I was all ready for this emotional landslide and everything and, in the end, it ended up working out pretty good. I won't go into details as to what happened because that's between us, but things are looking up. We're not together and we won't be as long as he's in school, but this summer holds the possibility of maybe getting back together. We kissed, though, and he said "I love you" so that's gotta be a good sign. But that's all I'm saying about that. Tomorrow's Mother's Day so Happy Mother's Day to all the KiwiMoms out there! I think that's about it for now from here. I'm feeling kinda blah still so I think I'm going to go lay down. Have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios! [color=#FFFFFF]  [/img]my dog...just because she looks like she's posing lol  [/img]the boy, the last time I saw him...back when things were good  [/img]me today before Max came, trying to look happy[/color] ||||||||||||||||||||||||| SuperHolly: thanks :) TimberBassBaby: thanks :) dans_no1_chicka: I'm sure that'll heal me a lot! lol thanks! bluDragonGrl: thanks :) altmanst: thank youuuuu <3 ||||||||||||||||||||||||| Wearing ->jeans, "Save Notre Dame" tee shirt Hair ->down Jewelry ->a few black jelly bracelets, class ring, silver thumb ring, heart bracelet (like the Tiffany's ones), and belly ring Makeup ->concealer, blush, eyeshadow, and mascara Eating/Drinking ->nothing/berry flavored Gatorade Talking To ->Max on and off Listening To ->nothing Thinking ->I hope Max and I get back together this summer Loving ->Max :\ Hating ->that we're not together Went To Bed At ->8:54 pm Woke Up At ->10:17 am Plans For The Day ->nothing, really About To ->go upstairs to my room Mood ->mixed emotions Weather ->67* and sunny, not a cloud in the sky Time ->4:46 pm ||||||||||||||||||||||||| no entrybluDragonGrl, cheerleader157, dans_no1_chicka, SuperHolly, TimberBassBaby
I'm super sick with a fever, nausea, all that good stuff so no entry. Be back when I feel better. || little did i know you were just another dead end road made with pretty lies and broken dreams ||[bgcolor=#333333][color=#333333][rimg=img.photobucket.com/albums/v45/preteefairee6/howshefeelsicon.jpg][/rimg].[/color][/bgcolor]
. . . . *sigh* It's been a long, horrible 24 hours. Yesterday around this time Max and I officialy broke up for good. I hung up on him and went downstairs and bawled to my mom. I'm still crying over it and it sucks horribly. I think it may be worse than when Dan and I broke up. He's coming here on Saturday, though, to get his stuff back. He said we could talk a little, but I think it's going to be so hard. I know I'll lose it in, like, the first five minutes. I call that one right now. brokenillusion33 (5:17:24 PM): the picture i drew and the sappy note (notes?). anything you have that reminds you of me, i want back. brokenillusion33 (5:17:31 PM): just forget about me more than you already have itstoohotout (5:18:26 PM): i havent forgotten about you, i was really tore up earlier, if you care brokenillusion33 (5:18:45 PM): yea i've been crying since 10 last night, i know how it goes. crying in school...real classy brokenillusion33 (5:18:57 PM): reading a love poem in lit...real ironic brokenillusion33 (5:19:11 PM): thinking the guy that "loved you" would take you back someday and then realizing he'd rather not...real nice brokenillusion33 (5:19:24 PM): but, in my famous words, i don't care brokenillusion33 (5:23:43 PM): but whatever itstoohotout (5:24:03 PM): i gtg brokenillusion33 (5:24:15 PM): bye itstoohotout (5:24:19 PM): bye brokenillusion33 (6:02:19 PM): new idea....if you want your stuff you can come get it. i'm not paying shipping for it and i'm not driving up there. i'm not doing shit for you. so if you want it, drive your ass down here. otherwise, too fuckin' bad, you're not getting anything back. brokenillusion33 (6:03:01 PM): and i don't give a shit if that sounds bitchy because, quite honestly, i don't give a shit about it anymore. i don't think i need to be happy so i'll be how i feel. so whatever, you decide if you want your shit or not. brokenillusion33 (7:02:40 PM): did you get my im? itstoohotout (7:03:00 PM): yeah itstoohotout (7:03:19 PM): ill prolly pick it up this weekend itstoohotout (7:03:30 PM): if your there brokenillusion33 (7:03:37 PM): ok...yea no one'll be home saturday except me so then would probably be best itstoohotout (7:03:47 PM): ok itstoohotout (7:03:52 PM): when? brokenillusion33 (7:04:01 PM): i'll be here all day brokenillusion33 (7:04:06 PM): not like i have anyone to be with brokenillusion33 (7:06:10 PM): by the way thanks itstoohotout (7:06:39 PM): ? brokenillusion33 (7:07:52 PM): in some ways, you're not very different from dan. saying you'll never hurt me, saying you'll always love me, nice lies. but thanks for the good that there was. itstoohotout (7:10:45 PM): im sorry that it had to end like this brokenillusion33 (7:11:06 PM): i'm sorry that it had to end....period itstoohotout (7:13:02 PM): we both have things we dont like about the other, and its always been like that, and honestly i dont think it would have worked out in the end itstoohotout (7:13:05 PM): you may think differently brokenillusion33 (7:15:23 PM): just a little. you're never going to find a girl that you like everything about. it's impossible. and i think it would have. in fact, i still do. but, no. you sit there and get upset that i said i want a break and you make me feel horrible about it and then you tell me you don't want to get back together. do you have any idea how badly that hurt? i haven't stopped crying since and i don't think i will for the longest time. i've been holding on to your hoodie, sleeping with my teddy, hoping that this is a bad dream i'll wake up from. but it's not. and i realize it's all my fault, but i don't want this at all. i love you, it's not fair. i want to hate you for doing this to me, but i can't. i hate you and love you all at once and it sucks. i want to curl up in a ball and die it hurts so bad. i hate you for doing this to me, but i love you for how happy you made me. i just don't want this to end and it's killing me. itstoohotout (7:17:47 PM): i dont know that there isnt that girl that i like everything about because i havent dated anyone else brokenillusion33 (7:19:08 PM): trust me, there isn't. no one's perfect. no, i don't like everything about you, but i love the way you make me feel and i love the way we are when we're together. i was just planning on how to get you back when you come home for the summer and then, boom, you tell me you don't want to!? i thought you "loved me". load of bullshit, i guess. brokenillusion33 (7:19:26 PM): never tell any girl you meet in the future that you'll never hurt them...it's a lie, i can see that now itstoohotout (7:30:12 PM): can we talk a little on saturday or do you want to just give me my stuff? brokenillusion33 (7:30:41 PM): we can talk...just no i won't be in the best of moods, as if that wasn't obvious already brokenillusion33 (7:32:15 PM): i'll just make sure i don't wear makeup. cuz i can't talk to you, or think about you for that matter, without crying brokenillusion33 (7:32:24 PM): you think you've seen me a wreck before, just wait itstoohotout (7:34:27 PM): ok brokenillusion33 (7:34:56 PM): if only this was just a bad drema brokenillusion33 (7:34:59 PM): dream* brokenillusion33 (7:36:26 PM): oh and you wondered why i cut myself? what else am i supposed to when the only person i want around doesn't want to be around? brokenillusion33 (7:40:29 PM): do me a favor though...do this. because i put this in my livejournal and no one got them all right. then i figure you know me best so i was curious if you did it how close you'd be. seeing, you know, you're the only one who knows my whole being. so do this. brokenillusion33 (7:40:30 PM): what is my favortie color? what is my favorite animal? who is my best friend? what side of the politcal spectrum am i on? what is my religious beliefs? who do i like? what is my favortie band? what is my favorite book? what do i wanna be when i grow up? what college am i going to? who is my hero? what is my favorite song? itstoohotout (7:42:27 PM): dont know a couple brokenillusion33 (7:42:41 PM): i bet you would have had the best score.....:-brokenillusion33 (7:42:55 PM): last week of high school, supposed to be the best week, and it's actually the worst brokenillusion33 (7:42:58 PM): lovely brokenillusion33 (7:43:30 PM): but i'm going to attempt to eat now (haven't been very in the mood) brokenillusion33 (7:43:39 PM): i'll be back in a bit if you're still on or care itstoohotout (7:43:46 PM): ok itstoohotout (7:43:48 PM): ill be hrer brokenillusion33 (7:44:00 PM): ok brokenillusion33 (7:44:04 PM): .............................................bye itstoohotout (7:44:10 PM): bye Yep, real great. I hate life right now. On the plus side, though, I saw Mike today. He actually wrote me a note too! So now I have to make sure I write him back tomorrow. :) He gave me lots of hugs too and he said 'I love you'. Awwww. I mean, he didn't mean it like THAT, but it made my day a lot better. What would I do without Mike right about now? I heart that kid bad. Well, I don't really feel like writing cuz I'm pretty down so I'm out of here. Have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios. altmanst TimberBassBaby dans_no1_chicka bluDragonGrl . . . . . [color=#FFFFFF]©kIwIKT6[/color]|| even the people who never froun eventually break down ||[bgcolor=#FF0033][color=#FF0033]
|| Date: 05/03/05 || Entry: 37 || Mood: confused || [/color][/bgcolor][bgcolor=#FF0066][color=#FF0066]Do itWhoo, little nasty girl Yo man, see that? Damn[/color][/bgcolor][bgcolor=#FF0099][color=#FF0099]  [/img]. God, I'm so exhausted! And I got a busy weekend ahead of me so not a lot of sleep there either. Oh well. Anyways, how's everyone doing? I'm good. Today was much better than yesterday so yay for that. Now all I need is sleep and it'll be a good time lol. We had a SADD assembly with Notre Dame today. They reenacted a car accident with bloody victims and everything. Was definitely a bit of a scare. Definitely will never drink and drive! But it was cool. Only bad thing was that it was outside on the football field and it was FREEZING! Minus that it was cool, though. Rest of the day was pretty much doing nothing. Being the last week all my teachers are doing one of two things, either freaking out and trying to cram a bunch into a couple days or doing nothing because they realize we're done caring now. So it's been interesting lol. I saw Mike today too. I wrote him a note Sunday telling him the whole story of the situation and what I feel about him. A couple of my friends read it and they said that it sounded really good. So, today, I went to a meeting after school during the underclassmen's 7th hour for Senior Farewell, then made a quick run to McDonald's with Jennie and Megan (who told me Mike and I would make a cute couple), and then got back to ND to see Mike. Unforntunately it was a little after 3 and he was already in choir. Someone said they were done by 4 at the latest, though, so I stuck around cuz I'm a loser like that lol. I saw Miguel (my prom date) and he gave the note to Mike. So, finally, choir was over and the guys were coming out and Mike came out reading the note. Oh man, did I get nervous! He "skimmed it" and promised me that he would write me back for tomorrow seeing I have another meeting tomorrow so I can go over there after school. So then we left at the same time and he gave me a huge hug. Like, if you had seen it, you would have been like "whoaaa". It was very long and very tight. I litteraly had his jacket in my fist like I wouldn't let go. It was the nicest hug I think anyone's ever given me. So maybe that means he likes me and wants to do something after all? Hell if I know! lol. But I definitely want another hug like that. It was definitely very nice. All I know is I hope he does have a note for me tomorrow and I hope it says he likes me too. That's all I want right now. Hmmm what else is going on? Oh! Max is coming home this weekend. We might see each other on Saturday. Is that going to be awkward? Ohhhhh yea. I don't think he knows anything about Mike either. AWKWARD! I mean, I've dropped really obvious hints in my LiveJournal but Max doesn't read my LiveJournal very often so I don't know. I'm so confused about this whole situation with Mike and I and Max and I. I feel like I'm bottoming out. I cut last night. Do you even know how long it's been since I cut? I felt kind of guilty afterwards cuz Max broke me of that habit and I did it. So I tried calling him but his cell was off. I told him online today, though, and he didn't really seem to have any kind of a reaction. I don't know. Maybe we'll never get back together? Maybe Mike is my "meant to be"? Maybe neither is? I don't know, but all this stress about everything (with school on top of it, of course) is going to kill me. Well, I think that's all the negativity I have for today lol. Hopefully I'll have a more positive entry tomorrow. Especially if things go the way I want with Mike. But I'm trying not to get my hopes up so I don't get to crushed. But, whatever, ya know? Anyways, yea, I'm done now. I'm outta spaces anyways lol. So have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios! . dans_no1_chicka TimberBassBaby SuperHolly bluDragonGrl . . [bgcolor=#FF0066][color=#FF0066]Well honey (Whatcha got Mr. Mans) [/color][/bgcolor][bgcolor=#FF0033][color=#000000][/color][/bgcolor]I got a lot of money (I don't see no keys in my hands) Could you be my nasty girl And let me do that dirty dance witchu (If you want just give me money) Mommy (Ooo Whee Poppi) Shake that sexy body (Do you like what you see?) I just wanna nasty girl Now tell me is that nasty girl you? (I can love you long time) || what if i gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you ||[rimg=img.photobucket.com/albums/v45/preteefairee6/masks.jpg][/rimg]
||||||||||||||||||||||||| I'm not a "drama geek"... ...I'm a Stage Princess ||||||||||||||||||||||||| Wow today has been a long day. We had early dimissal at school, but it still felt like the day would never end. From 7:40 until 12:35 I was stuck in my school's auditorium taking an AP exam. I was so sick of it so fast that I thought I was going to die lol. Today was AP English Lang and Comp and it was definitely long. I think I did good on it, but it just never seemed to end. At least it's over now and I only have two more AP exams to go, one on Thursday and one next Tuesday. So yay for that. And yay for today being the beginning of the end, as this is my last week of high school. Emotional, but I'm so ready for the stress and work to be over. So yay for that at least. Things are still rocky in regards to Mike and I. I really think he likes me but the whole drama surrounding the situation is preventing him from doing anything. I wrote him a note that's one piece of looseleaf filled on both sides explaining how I feel and the facts of what's going on and everything, really. I'm going over to Notre Dame after school tomorrow so hopefully I'll see him and I'll be able to give him the note so he'll understand. I just want him to take the risk and be with me, I guess. So much for fairytale endings, huh? *sigh* At least I have something to add to my list of things to look forward to, though. Steve (altmanst) is coming down here!!!! That just made my entire day seem a lot better. And, believe me, it's been a pretty crappy day. It'll definitely be two very good days. If only you could stay down here. I LOVE YOU!!!! :D Well, I think that's really it from here. I'll talk to y'all tomorrow after hopefully seeing Mike. Have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios! [color=#CCCCCC]  [/img]you have no idea how much I look at this picture <3  [/img]Steeeeve! I'm going to make a countdown for how many days 'til you come here lol  [/img]Mike...I'm crazy about him but this damn drama is ruining it all :(  [/img]want a piece of this? I'm legal in 11 days ;)[/color] ||||||||||||||||||||||||| SuperHolly: That's what I plan on doing. I'm sure it'll all work out for the best in the end. :) daddyzgirl528: Yay for us May babies! Aww thanks for the compliment on the layout. Yea, I'm sure everything will be fine in the longrun. lol Yes Mike's the one in the green. And he definitely is a hottie! dans_no1_chicka: Oh you know it...I got hoeees, in different a-re-a codeeees. Wanna ND it with me tomorrow? TimberBassBaby: Yea it hailed here for like 2 minutes today. It was pretty weird. And I agree with you all the way. altmanst: You definitely put a smile on my face! You just my bad day sooo much better. I smile everytime I think about you coming down here. I love you so so so sooo much!!!! bluDragonGrl: lol Yea I'm very excited. I can't wait for college. But, from what I gather, I can wait for the after college part lol. ||||||||||||||||||||||||| Wearing ->light gray lounge pants with a little pink heart on the hip outlined in jewels, gray tee from my old gym, and black hoodie Hair ->down and still drying from my shower Jewelry ->just my belly ring Makeup ->none Eating/Drinking ->finished selfmade dinner/Sierra Mist Talking To ->nobody right this second Listening To ->silence...ooooo :P Thinking ->about how badly I want things to work with Mike Loving ->that it's the last week of high school Hating ->that it's only Monday Went To Bed At ->10 something but then woke up again at midnight when my parents came up for bed...grr Woke Up At ->6:46 am Plans For The Day ->breaaaathe for the first time today About To ->call my best friend, Jackie Mood ->exhausted Weather ->47* and cloudy/rainy Time ->7:25 pm ||||||||||||||||||||||||| |
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