KraZii_BlueZ , 24

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Heyyyy. So today's been a long day because I didn't get to sleep until 1 in the morning yesterday and then had to be up nice and early for school. So I'm pretty dead. But I get to miss tomorrow to be a leader for a sophomore retreat and I get to miss Thursday to see a play with my Theater Arts class. So I guess it balances out pretty good. Have to be to school early but then it's all good. So yay for that.

What else? I think I might be spending Saturday night at Alison's house cuz she's having a bonfire and I want to go for more than a couple hours so I'm trying to convince my mom seeing it doesn't start 'til 9 anyways. Then just meet my mom at church in the morning. It'd be a fun time. And, yes, "the other guy" aka Andrzej, is probably coming. But shhh. lol.

Well, I really don't have anything to say so I'm gonna jet. I leave you with a couple random pictures cuz I'm weird like that. :P Have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios!

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cute little graduation bear in my color cap and gown that I got through school

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older picture but kinda how I've been feeling lately

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the little puppy my mom bought me today lol

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my senior shirt

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the back of my senior shirt



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[font=Wingdings]{[/font] Well, it's day one of being single after a long, long time of being taken. Not quite sure what I think of this, but I guess we'll learn eh? Max and I are definitely broke up. I don't know if it'll be permanent or not but I guess only time can tell, right? So we'll see what happens. The worst part was when he asked me if there was another guy involved and I had to be honest. I mean, there's sort of another guy. I like him and I'm curious to see what could happen with him. Then I have a comparison, see if Max is really my "meant to be" or if breaking up was the right thing to do and he's not my type. I just told this guy that I like him and he said that he thinks I'm a nice girl and I'm pretty so we'll just see what happens. We don't know each other that well so we both agreed to hanging out more to get to know each other more and just see what develops. So my friends and I are having a party on Friday and he's coming. Should be interesting.
[font=Wingdings]{[/font]Then today was back to school. Ick. My brain's definitely still in Spring Break mode lol. Luckily my teachers were mostly in Spring Break mode still too so we didn't do much. After school I ran home for a bit and then went back for play practice. Saw "the other guy". He was the stand-in for a principal girl that wasn't there today when we did one of our dances. At one point the girls get in a circle and hold hands for awhile as we go around in a circle. Well the girl's always next to me when we do it. Seeing she wasn't there, guess who was next to me? Yep, "the other guy". So I got to hold his hand a couple times for awhile. I can't lie, there were butterflies in my stomach. It's like being a little kid all over again with those good old elementary school crushes. I can't deny it, I kind of hope something happens...and soon.
[font=Wingdings]{[/font]Play's in 16 days. We have practice almost every day now. I'm definitely going to be worn out, but at least I get to see "the other guy". Yes he has a name, but "the other guy" has just been my friends and my nickname for him lol. We're losers, I know. Ooo and Maroon 5 concert with my mom and Alison in 10 days. Yesss! I think this month is gonna be pretty interesting.
[font=Wingdings]{[/font]Well, that ends it from here for the time being. I'll talk to y'all later. Have a good one. Adios!
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me...

...and the two guys I'm torn between right now

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my, well, I guess he'd be my ex now...Max

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Andrzej aka "the other guy"[/color]

[font=Wingdings]{[/font]dans_no1_chicka[font=Wingdings]{[/font][font=Wingdings]{[/font]Westbound_Sign[font=Wingdings]{[/font][font=Wingdings]{[/font]altmanst[font=Wingdings]{[/font][font=Wingdings]{[/font]RESPONDER[font=Wingdings]{[/font]

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Yep, it's me again. Chillin' at home while the parentals are out with the music up loud and all that hot shit. Nice way to end my Spring Break. Back to school tomorrow, but at least it's only a month and then I graduate. HELL YES! That'll be nice, can't lie. Senioritis is in full force.

Yesterday was interesting. Woke up 11:30ish and had breakfast with the parentals. Max called my cell during breakfast to say bye cuz he was heading up to school. I talked to him for a little bit and then finished my breakfast. Spent the rest of the day just doing little things until it got to be evening. Then my mom and I went to Salvation Army to look for a costume for the play for me. We found a skirt I could use so we bought that and then headed to Algonac for a jewelry party. Was kind of boring but I got a cute heart bracelet, kind of like the Tiffany's ones, and 3 rings out of it so it was worth it. Mom got stuck in the mud on the way out so that was an adventure getting her car out. Kind of entertaining, I can't lie. Came home, watched Summerland, and had Burger King before attempting to sleep (which didn't work very well). With daylight savings time, I only got 4 hours of sleep. Needless to say, I'm pretty dead feeling now.

Today I got up with very little sleep and went to church where it was a huge struggle cuz my eyes were burning and I felt like shit from being so tired. I felt like I had been up all night. Max has been sick and I'm thinking I may have gotten it too. Blah. Came home from church and had Tim Horton's and now am just being a lazy bum for my last couple hours out of the school world. I know the stress will all come back tomorrow so I'm enjoying being a little stressfree right now.

Things with Max and I got kind of ugly again. But this time I guess I'm the bad guy. When Max said he wanted a break my initial reaction was hurt and anger and just really not wanting a break. But, as I thought about it, I thought maybe it was a good thing after all. Then he took me back and I thought it was just a sympathy move so I thought more about the break and decided it'd be a good idea afterall. Then I saw him Friday and he did everything perfect. He was wonderful. And he was so sincere when he told me the break was a mistake and that he loved me. Well how the hell can I answer that with saying I changed my mind!? So I choked and didn't say anything. Bad move. Now he's gone at school and I can't sit down, look him in the eyes, and explain everything. So I have to do it long distance and it sucks. I told him I want a break. I'm too young to plan my whole life. My aunt dated one guy, married him straight out of high school, and now is paying hell for it and wishing she could have her childhood back. I don't want to end up like that. I don't want to hurt him, I really do love him, I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing and that this is really what I want. And he changes when he's in school and it's just so hard so now would be the best time to take a break. I just hope he doesn't hate me right now. :\ I hate life sometimes. Most of the time.

Well, that's my novel for the day. I'll leave you with some pictures of when I was a little happier (aka yesterday) and I'll talk to y'all later. Have a good one. Adios.

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playing with my hair

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being silly :P

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trying to look like a bitchy punk...mission: failure

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I liked this picture but now I think it's gay

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how I normally look for school

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actually wearing my Prom dress...it looks bad, though, cuz the back's not tied up and I look like shit seeing this is when I first woke up

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my belly ring that I think is infected now :(



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Heylo. How's everybody doing? I'm not bad. Just chillin' for awhile before my mom and I go to a jewelry party tonight at some friend of my mom's house in Algonac. Bit of a drive but at least it gets me pretty things. :) lol. But, anyways, yea. Max went back to school this morning. I'm not really sad yet but I think that's just because my brain hasn't processed it yet. Give me a little while and then I'll get sad.

Went to his house yesterday to say bye. Helped wash his car and pack all his stuff up. It was sad but he was being super adorable so that helped. Still have a lot on my mind about us but we'll see as time unfolds.

Well, I don't really feeling like writing an entry so I'm gonna get ready for the party. I'll talk to y'all later. Have a good one. Adios.


UPDATE:

RIP Pope John Paul II. You are with God now.


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So I guess March was my "technical" blue month. It would have been a blue month if my journals didn't randomly delete and I had to start all over again. So yay for a semi blue month! lol. And now it's April, the last month of high school. WOOHOO! lol not that I'm excited, of course.

I don't really have anything to say today, just wanted to drop in and say hi. I think I'm going to Max's house today. He's getting sick so he's a little under the weather so my stepdad might drive me up there instead of Max getting me. I'm not really sure what's going on. All I know is we have a lot to talk about so this should be an interesting night.

Well, that's it from here for now. Off to take a nice hot shower. Have a good one and I'll talk to y'all later. Adios!


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