Readalottobooks , 25

If Kiwibox 3.0 does come out, I will most likely be creating (or reviving) another journal. If that happens, I'll send you the link, Anne. Kiera, if you stumble upon this, I'll sign onto AIM and let you know.

Many things have happened lately. Good, bad, ugly, awesome, the whole gamut. Tonight's not the time to update, though.

Thursday night: closed at work. Went to Azteca with some of the girls (Angela, Becky, Vicky, and Carla). Had two Mexican beers. They left at 10. I decided that was too early, so I went to Old Chicago. Had a few more beers :)
Friday I opened at work. Chris and I went to OC. Darcy and her husband and kids joined us, so we had to keep it between G and PG. Brett joined. I got some good hugs from Chris.
Yesterday I cashiered at work, and I had a huge headache after work. Chris called right as I clocked out wondering if I wanted to do something (!). I said give me an hour to relax or so. So, I took some ibuprofen and by 8, I was fine. Chris and I went bowling. I had a lot of fun, even though I sucked at bowling. I threw several gutterballs, but some of those bounced out of the gutter and actually knocked over some pins! We then went to OC afterwards. Friday night, Chris finished his beer tour. Next time I go I'll finish mine.

Work has sucked lately. I'm working too many days in a row. I haven't sold many phones lately. I need to talk to Jeremy about getting out of cell phones. I don't really care where I go, preferably the floor, but I really don't want to be over there any more. We'll see what happens.

School also has me really down right now. I need to drop US history. I don't need the class, and it's so boring. The professor does not know how to teach or speak publicly. Economics is good, but not in a US history class. If I wanted an economic focus, I would've taken a history of economics class. Hopefully I'd be able to survive with the remaining 4 classes.

One of my favorite servers at OC (who also happens to be the sister of one of my coworkers) decided that we're going to get our hair cut together. I haven't had my hair cut in at least a year and a half. After we get our hair done, she's going to do my makeup, and we're going to wear cute clothes, and then we're going to have dinner and drinks at OC. I think it'll be fun! I do have to reschedule an eye appointment, but I can do that.

It's been a little bit since I updated.

Sara called me on Thursday, and we went to Harrington's. We had a good time there, and enjoyed two beers. Around ten o clock, Sara decided that she was hungry for cheese fries, so guess where we went. Old Chicago! I get there, and my bartender friend Sara came over and talked with us for a while. She asked me where "my man" was. She also thought for sure we were married (!) or at least dating. I set her straight. Anyway, Sara and I finished out the night there, and it was awesome to catch up with her! She's loving her teaching job.

Friday was a good time. I closed at work, and some of the other girls start talking about going to OC after work. So I go and join them. Chris joins us. Whew! At least we'll still be OC beer buddies! Anyway, standard night at OC playing trivia and drinking beer. I did still get a few hugs from him that night. He gives some of the best hugs ever.

Saturday was the Hawkeye game. Some family was having a big party, so my parents and I went. I brought a six pack of one of my favorite beers (Boulevard unfiltered wheat) and had a good time watching the game, eating food and helping my cousin run the bets they had going on.

Let's skip ahead to Tuesday. I had class. Learned I got 88% on my western civ test, so I was happy about that. Then I took a test in US History. I'm seriously considering dropping that class. The professor sucks majorly, and it's not a class I need to graduate. Plus, I'd still be over 12 cr hrs if I dropped it. I might see how I do on the test first. Anyway, I sit with a coworker, Shannon, between classes at Scott and we talk. She starts talking about some awesome parties she used to have. So, we started planning this awesome party complete with her recipe of Apple Pie. Mmmmmm. Not sure when that'll be yet. Anyway, at work Tuesday night, I was running around like crazy doing Jeremy's projects. I was going nuts.
I felt like a beer after work, so I went to Old Chicago. I like the staff there. I sit down at the bar, next to a guy who happened to be celebrating his birthday and the completion of his 10th beer tour. Another guy came and sat on my left drinking the cheap $1 cans, but I convinced him to sign up for the beer tour and for PlayersPlus (for the trivia). He told me he brewed his own beer. Honestly the whole time I was like, fine tell me all you want but i just want to play trivia, drink my Mexican beers and eat my awesome Steak N Shroom sandwich (I highly recommend that sandwich if you ever go to OC). So, I think I'm done after my 3rd beer, so I cash out. I notice that my beer tour slip says Christopher, not Kimberly. Guess I somehow got Chris' card by mistake on Friday. They were able to look up my account, so we both got credit for the three Mexican beers I drank. Divo (one of the servers, the gay one I accidentally played footsie with a few weeks ago) came over and sat by me at the bar. He bought me another beer so that he'd have someone to sit with. He showed me a fun hangman game on the trivia playmakers. We chatted. He's cool. Then, a little before midnight, Bob, the guy who's at OC for 8 hours every single night of the week (and who's completed over 150 beer tours) decided he was buying shots for the bar. He decides on tequila. Patron. The only time I've ever done tequila was on my 23rd birthday this past year. Anyway, so the shots come. I down it like a pro. I was surprised. We sit there playing games and chatting for a while, then I decide I could use another beer. I get the American Craft Flight which is a sampler of 4 different beers, and two of them happen to be my favorites. Other people are buying shots now, but I'm smart and turned them all down.

Anyway, I had fun last night. I like Old Chicago and the people.

And I just remembered something else. On Friday, one of our favorite waitresses, Crystal, decided that she was going to give me a makeover. So I'm going to go with her sometime to get my hair cut, and then she's going to play with my makeup. I haven't had my hair cut in at least a year and a half.

Well, that's all I should update on. Jeez, Anne, if I keep writing huge long entries like this there'd not be much to say in person on the phone!

I don't know who reads this anymore. I don't even know if anyone reads this.


Anyway, the last several entries have been about Chris.

There's absolutely no chance of us happening.

I'm disappointed about it.

I'm really ashamed of what I did Friday night.

It was a standard Friday night at Old Chicago. I had my four beers for the tour, and we all decided to do a shot. So, I bought a round of Washington Apples.

I think the shot was too strong. A standard shot wouldn't have made me overly drunk.

I was not thinking clearly. Chris and I were in the parking lot for a long time talking that night. Til nearly 3 am. Yes, long after the place actually closed.

I pretty much offered to go to his place and sleep with him then and there.

I am never that open (or desperate).

He refused. I forget exactly what he said, but I know he said that we had no chance together.

I remember I tried asking him questions to find out why.

He talked about one of his ex-girlfriends.



Anyway, I didn't think much of it that night. I remember thinking I'd eventually get him to change his mind.

The next day, I realized what happened. Honestly I'm not sure what's going to happen. Are we going to remain friends? I'm not sure. Will we continue going to Old Chicago? I'm not sure. I haven't talked to him since then, and I probably should. We just work opposite shifts.

Anyway, this all basically led to me being depressed. FUCK! I thought I was over it!

I texted a few people, and they helped a bit. But the people that I could've used a talking with never responded.

I've been trying to get a hold of Sara to do something for the last two weeks. I've left voice mails, text messages, I've even tried reaching Ryan. No response from either of them.

It's killing me, not talking to Sara.

The one nice thing about today, though, I did spend some time with Lidija and Ann. We just chilled and watched tv, and I told them a watered down version of what happened Friday night. We also started making plans for a Christmas get-together!!! Yay!!!


Anyway, I'm really hoping that this is a very minor funk that I'm in. I really hope that I'll be able to talk to Sara soon. I really hope that perhaps Brett'll be there for some much needed physical contact this weekend. I'm dying for one of his backrubs!

Anyway, time to write a paper. yay.

Wow. I do not remember writing that last entry. Oh well. I did have a good time overall that night.

Classes have started. I think I'll be working my ass off even harder this semester. The way these classes are set up makes it so easy for me to brush off anything I might have to do. No terminology :(. No note cards.

I've been going to Old Chicago a lot lately. Probably too much. Probably way too much. I think after I finish the beer tour in 35 beers (or so), I'll stop going out so often. Maybe once a week. And it'll be cheap beers. Not those that cost $8.99 a bottle. Those are so yummy though :D.

Chris keeps sending mixed signals. Not sure if something will happen there.

I had a girls night out last night. Lidija convinced me to join eHarmony. I did, but I haven't subscribed yet. I might, or I might not. I think I want to see if anything happens with Chris in the next month before I decide.

I've been trying to thing about relationship type things. I think I just like physical contact. If I just hang out with Brett enough, then I'd probably be okay. Honestly I don't have much (if any) interest in sex. Only one person that I know of knows about this. And I haven't talked to her in ages.

I'm slightly worried about Sara. She's back on antidepressants. She's working a lot of hours each week, and I hardly talk to her any more. I really hope she's doing okay. I just don't know a good time to call her to chat!

Work has been going very well. I'm selling lots of phones! On top of that, I'm still running around and helping out the floor and the front end. In fact, I did so much running today that my legs are very sore.

I need to start thinking about calling it a night.