essencexofxtear , 23

Well girls, i'm going back to Michigan for good tomorrow. So that means that i won't be making entries very often.. However, if they do launch kiwi 3.0 i probably won't stick around. So you can find me on myspace or facebook, if you want to keep in touch..

Myspace
www.myspace.com/x___robin___x

Facebook
www.facebook.com/people/Robin-Ahearn/629279581

I talked to Dani today.. She told me on Thursday she miscarried her baby. The doctor said it was because she has a tipped uterus, and it punctured the sac. So they want her to have surgery done.. If she doesn't she'll never carry a baby full term. I looked up some stuff on it, and it says that it's rare to miscary a baby because of that.

My grandma came home from the hospital today... To die. She made it home about 4pm Eastern and died around 4:10. My dad and cousin Candi went to see her i'm assuming yesterday and my dad didn't think she knew who they were. She got Pneumonia.. My aunt Kay and aunt Mary are still trying to figure out the funeral details.

I'm sure i'll be spending a lot of time listening to these lyrics.. The song gives me a little bit of peace or something.. it just makes me feel a litle better thinking about people who are gone.

I reach towards the sky I've said my goodbyes
My heart's always with you now
I won't question why so many have died
My prayers have made it through yeah
’Cause with all these things we do
It don't matter when I'm coming home to you


I'm not sure if i mentioned in here how my sister kind of implied that i was molested as a kid by a cousin of ours. Well, i know it happened now. I don't remember him physically doing anything but i remember my mom asking me if he did.. And me lying to her and telling her no.. Because if i told her yes, i felt like i was going to be in trouble or that she'd be ashamed of me somehow.

Maybe i subconsciously knew that was going to come out, cuz a day or two before that i told Josh that i wasnt really in the mood for sex, and if we never had sex again for the next 90 years i wouldn't care. Cuz i know he's gonna want to when i come home.

So i know why i threw up now.. Cuz of my period starting.. I've never done that before though..

Josh has been hanging out with this girl Suzy lately.. I normally wouldn't care, he can hang out with whoever the hell he wants to, but this is what made me care.
Suzy put on her facebook page she couldn't wait to talk to her baby later that day. My friend Dani happened to look at it cuz she's friends with Suzy's soon to be ex husband and he said something about Dani having a boyfriend.. So she was curious to see who.. Then she seen Suzy and this girl Rose talking about how this guy was a potential boyfriend. Rose asked his name and Suzy told her.. So Dani wrote that he had a girlfriend and Suzy flipped out on her. She assumed Dani meant Derek, her ex. So Dani corrected her, and Suzy flipped out even more, calling Dani a whore, talking about Alex, and how he's gonna leave her. And called Dani a bitch and all kinds of other stuff. And she told Dani she wasn't gonna back off Josh.

So then Dani seen them hanging out after Josh and i had a talk about Suzy.. He says he's not gonna date her, and nothing sexual happened while they were hanging out before. He says he was gonna tell her there's not a chance of them being together but i don't know if he did,.

My grandma's not doing well again.. My mom sent me a message telling me that. She asked if my sister told me.. Nope..

I'm supposed to be going back to Michigan for good around the 17th.

and i managed to get sick again.. I felt like i was gonna throw up at like 11 last night but i didn't do it until 3:30 this morning.. Not sure why i did. I couldn't sleep either. Steve got up at 7 this morning to go fishing. He couldn't sleep either. I still feel like i'm gonna throw up but haven't again and i'm frezing. I did manage a 4 hour nap today so there's my sleep.