humanhead , 18

i look around and its all dark

i look around and am alone

every body i know is gone

away!

i shout out their names

the ones i remember, at least

but i get no answer,

they are gone!

so i started statistics for maths and its okay. not as bad as core maths! got my term exam results for history and law and am really happy with them :D i really should blog more. its more about uneventfulness than laziness

hello there!

am done with my term exams. they are no big deal but the thing with terms is that you have to face your teacher after the paper and she has already read your answer so full of crap ad stupidity. my psychology paper was okay but my master commented on my handwriting while i was writing and that kinda messed with my concentration. maths is pretty okay. i had no paper for that but i think i'm more of a slow learner when it comes to maths.

up until yesterday i was depressed, for god knows what reason. i was just sad and thinking, i'll be 18 in jan and i dont even know the first thing about life. its scary, never had a guy, never known real love. not what the movies show but joy+happiness and all that. but this this friend nisal, he was messaging me and it made my day/night(since it was past 9 when we started talking. and he's your perfect guy friend. funny cute and lovable. so ya, am okay with life again.

so with all these free periods in school we basically spend a lot of time in this class room we have been given to hang around. and its just perfect when its us girls sitting in a circle, some sleeping, some doing some work, talking about this that and the other, or just sitting in silence, staring into the future. and its nice and basically like heaven. you love those friends no matter what and it doesnt matter who you are cuz you can talk about anything and everything with them. they'll laugh at your lame jokes, they'll listen to your pathetic depressing stories.

but i cant forget the pals i've been with since grade 5. thats since 8 years ago. we are no longer in the same class or building but its nice to be able to still tell them anything. the most shameful things you've done, anything. and after a really bad day in school, even a minute with them makes it seem better. so ya, i may complain about everything, i may not be grateful of what i have but no matter what others say, i can proudly say that i have some really awesome friends. the best on earth and so perfect.

hello!

its been chaotic. so lets go day by day.

12th

got home at around 3.30 and a bath and went with my mum to order some pieces of butter cake, then to order some fruit tarts and some rolls and samosas and then grocery shopping for a competition ht enext day. got home at around 7.30, dead tired, made dinner, packed my stuff and went to bed without lunch or dinner.

13th-pineapple trophy

left home at 6, got to chool at 6.30. competition started at 8. was standing and cooking till 12. then waited for the judges to o their thing till 2. my dad picked me up by 3.30, got home dead tired and went to bed early, without dinner. all i had for the entire day was some noodles and some lemonade!

14th

didnt go to school. woke up at 11.30. stacked up the butter cake on some trays. went to the temple by 3.30. a monk spoke to us(thats bhana) from 4.30-5.30. then served cutlets, cake and tea to those who came. got home by 6, 6.30. was at my cousins till 9. again, nothing to eat all day.

15th

was up by 5. left home at 6.15. law olympiad organized by HELP university, Malaysia. was there from 8 to 5.30. our school came third. my dad rushed me back home for this thng known as a 'katina perahara' basically, we can take care of the monks of a certain temple for a month(during the rainy season when monks cant go begging for food) and then there is this special robe, that you take in a procession(though not all temples have one) to the temple where its sewn together and given to a certain monks. its a big do and extremely tiring. so i get here late and the first bit had already left, ruched to my room, changed, and joined my cousins and her friends and all. and walked for around 1 1/2 hours, in the night. then got back home, was busy serving food and what not. got home at 12, my cousin spent the night at my place because some of their relations were staying over next door and she had no place to sleep. fell alseep at around 1am.

16th

was up by 4.30am. got dressed, went to my cousins, walked to the temple at around 6. had a dhanaya or alms giving and then got back home at maybe 8am. had some stringhoppers with a potato curry for breakfast and got home by 9.30. had chocolate and some biscuits and went to bed at 8pm.

17th

woke up at 5.15 for school. got home at 3.45, had a bath and maths class from 5.30 to 7.30. we did trig so i was tired and stressed out. went to bed at 9.30!

so today is the 18th. and again on the 22nd we have another katina pinkama(thats without the procession) at another temple. so i wont have school. have to be up early and get home late. cook and get everything ready. then 24th and 25th i have my class trip. so by the end of that week i will be half dead!

so thats like one of the items or whatever you call it of the procession.

what the boy is carrying on his head is the katina cheewaraya or the special robe. you carry it with a lot of respect and as many people as can carry it for at least a minute.

those are some dancers. the last dance for the entire procession. basically marking the end of it.

i met my brother like friend who i hadnt spoken to in months on the 15th. and he actually told me he was busy and all, so we spoke and it was nice of him. so everything in my life is back to normal. except that nisal, a friend is acting a bit strange. i guess he is busy or something. oh well! have a nice day then :)