kayleysmommy103 , 22

So.. I'm definately really fucking frusterated. I feel like a single mom determined to get a break, but when I finally do, all I want to do is sleep. But I can't because there's always something that I have to do. I absolutley LOVE being a mom, & I definately can handle the responcibilities, I just... need a break.
Rich works from 8am-8pm. ALL day long. After he eats & showers, watches tv, plays on the computer, he goes to bed. I'm usually still up with Kayley. (It's 1:30am & she JUST went to sleep & he's been in bed since 10) I understand he works 12 hour days, but it's not like its hard work. He's a telemarketer for Dish Network. All I want is for him to spend time with us. Not to mention he spends more time at work with the skanky ass sluts than his family. I see him for maybe 20 minutes in the morning, and a couple hours at night - if I'm lucky.

I swear theres a fucking ghost in the comp or somethin... like... I wrote so much more in this entry but it just fuckin dissappeared. && it happeded twice. I'm reallly not tryin to type it a 3rd time.... Orrrr maybe im just going nuts..
Goodnight

Kayley is getting sooo big & way too quick! My lil baby's almost 1 & she just started walking. Her birthday is on Halloween, only a few more days =) She can say a few words ; night night, hi, mommy, daddy, bubba, && a few words that are still a lil jibberish. It's so damn cute. When she was a lil baby & sleepin all the time, I couldn't wait until she was walking & talking... now that she is & getting into everything, I miss when she couldn't. Lol I love being a stay at home mommyyy. She can point to her nose, eyes, ears, hair & were working on mouth. It's amazing how quick she catches on to something.

So it's been like... a long time since I posted an entry. The net was shut off for a few days & I've been busy.

Rich's other daughter, Haleigh came over the past couple weekends. She's 8 & such a lil sweety. She's got 2 younger brothers & was so happy when she found out me and daddy were having a girl. (So was I!! Rich wanted a boy)
A week before we found out, I seriously had a dream that we were having a girl.

I just found out a few days ago that I have another appt in Ann Arbor @ the University of Michigan. That's where I had my first back surgery. ( the other 2 were in Detroit ) I have no idea what to expect. I don't even know why I have to go down there. Hopefully it's productive & I'm not going 300 miles out of my way for nothing.

I have no car right now.. well, I have a car, it's just not legal, needs plates and insurance ... so that means I have to 'ask my mom for permission' (something I've never been good at) to use her car. && constantly she's on my ass about where I go... I understand it's her car, but I'm 19 & I put gas in it. She doesn't EVER leave the house her car just sits in the driveway. She's soo f*ing stingy its sickning. && The way she is with MY child... she acts like she's her mom... thats realllly getting on my nerves. It sucks when you've moved out of your parents.. and then you have to go back. Last weekend.. lol we got into a fight.. I was sitting on the couch & Kayley was right in front of me and my mom just kept bitching at me & I looked right at her and said fuck you... lol the phsyco bitch came at me & smacked me in my face. I was sittin in the corner of the couch & when she smacked me I moved Kayley & put my feet up to block her cus she was still swingin... so i kinda kicked her in the stomach & then she came at me with her 30 lb purse & her boyfriend pulled her away. I couldn't believe she did all that right in front of Kayley... So then, me and Rich started packing because we were going to go stay at a hotel for a couple weeks until we got our house.. but then we stayed so we could save that money... My whole life she's been like this. One word ; Bi-polar ...

Today was my appointment for SSI..This is my 2nd time applying & the lady said I had a good case & would 'probably' get it... and If they deny me again to appeal it (take them to court). I asked my mom to watch Kayley so she didn't have to sit there for a couple hours with me, but i guess my moms too 'busy'. .. I come home & she's sleepin.. LAZY BITCH.. GRR

Kayley was actually pretty good until the end.. she was tired & cranky. So anywhere from now, til 180 days i'll know if I get approved, or denied. Hopefully everything goes right...

About a week ago.. me & rich were in bed & I couldn't sleep at all.. I was restless & angry... I moved my pillow to the other side of the bed & just plopped my head down.. hard. I hit my head so hard on the window sill(sp?) I didn't even know what happened. It sticks out about an inch away from the wall & of course I hit my head on the corner. I started crying immediatley & rich woke up. I couldn't quit crying to tell him what happened & he was gettin worried.. After it kinda.. didn't hurt as much I felt it with my hand & there was a big ass bump... Well the last couple days, my tooth has been hurting SO FuCKING bad.. & I can feel it the most where I hit my head. I've been putting off going to the ER or the doctor, trying to make it better on my own &&&& its just not working. It makes me so fucking irritable.. the whole left side of my head throbs, my neck is stiff.. But today.. it just wont go away.. at all.. i smoke & its still fuckin there as before when id smoke.. it'd kinda calm it down... idFk..

I'm really in a shitty mood.. & its too bad cause I don't wanna be grumpy lol... but i can't help it.

I have to go pick rich up at 4.. so I'm gonna go lay down with kayley for a lil bit... I reallllly don't feel like doin shoutouts right now.. but I might update later.

<3

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List of responders

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hiddentruths, justxwaiitiing, KraZii_BlueZ

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List of subscribers

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BaByGrL14, BloomedGurl, hiddentruths, justxwaiitiing, KraZii_BlueZ, prettybutterfly, sunxshine, tabbiecatgirl07

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Today, in Michigan.. was fuckin unreal.. Yesturday it was rainy pretty much all day & today was way too fucking humid. 80 some degrees & 78% humidity. Rich took me out to lunch at El Mexicano... If you live in MI, I wouldn't recommend it. On the sign ( only reason we went there ) it said 99cent margaritas... Well, knowing that when I'm hungover, drinking again makes it better - it sounded good... I got a strawberry one & rich drank a coke. The food was okay... although the rice kinda tasted like dishsoap.. & what kinda mexican resturaunt puts mozzarella cheese on tacos? Apparently this one. Then the stupid waitress can't even speak english. FUCK - you work in america, don't ya THINK you should learn english? Anyways, she brings us the check & it says the margarita is $4.99... First of all, all it really was was an icee with strawberry pucker... then she tells us that only the lemon ones are 99cents.. You would think she would tell us that before we ordered.. but no, the dumb bitch can't even speak right. Then we went to wal-mart & got diapers & a gate so Kayley can't get into shit.. well the diapers were 15.97 & the gate was just 10$... and somehow we paid 12.42... oh well.
Then we went to the mall for a lil bit.. looked at shoes & shit... then we left. Kayley was sleeping when we left, so I just left her here with my momma...

Thats about it.. a boring ass day... i shouldn't be makin a habit out of drinking... so i'll quit on monday =)

Now... we're gonna go get in the shower.. smoke.. & prolly watch a movie or something... i aint going outside again for anybody.. shit its too damn hot..

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Shoutouts to people who responded

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BloomedGurl : I know it, I know someone with a horse... just no way to get it out here.. & he's not trained at all so ridin him here is out of the question too lol
justxwaiitiing : Too bad you couldn't have hooked me up.. my brother ripped us off... lol
KraZii_BlueZ : That's cool =) how do you like being an intern?
sunxshine : I'm 19 too! I know, I always say that until the next time I see it.. Lol My mom isn't the best, I don't concider her a bad mom... at least she never beat me..she had a pretty rough childhood also & some things i guess you never get over.. as much as a bitch she can be, lol she does a lot for me & i'm thankful for her. Sooooo happy I found some last night.. =)
have a nice day

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List of subscribers

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BaByGrL14, BloomedGurl, hiddentruths, justxwaiitiing, KraZii_BlueZ, sunxshine, tabbiecatgirl07

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