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m_suga   , 30

from Highland Lake


I hope I do the right thing!

Blog #1  6/24/2010... "I HOPE I DO THE RIGHT THING!"

..So this is my first online blog ever..Nothing like I took a big step in doing this...But I felt last night that it'd be a good idea to do something like this...It seems like it would be a healthy thing to do as often as I can.. Getting feelings out so they don't get bottled up inside and who knows where they could possibly might explode!!

So let me introduce myself...My name is Justin. I live in Alabama. I hate it. It's one of the many things I hate here..."Bitch" fest. Can we say? I am 24 years old and I plan on finishing EMT (Paramadeic work) this Decemeber...

00 yeah. If you haven't noticed..I'm gay. Rainbow lips up on my shat! lol. Okay..So what do I want to talk about today..000 yeah. Doing the right thing..

My friends...what can I say...they are my friends...But there's always imperfections or flaws in each person that I know no one will ever be perfect..But I should have to settle for this! I deserve better!..

Let me explain... Ok. Jose..gay close friend of mine..He's pretty real..up front and str8 foward about shat! What I'm sadden about right now is he want's to move to florida in December..He did invite me to move w/him..Bc honestly I think I may go crazy w/o him here w/me... But IDK if I will have the funds or not..Most i will have after budget is maybe 1500.00? Not nearly enough to where I feel comfortable moving 13hrs away from home and living off of until I find a job, which should be less than 7days bc it's a always hiring job when I complete the courses!

So...I just don't know..I mean If I don't go..He acts like he could careless if I go..A real friend would miss me and not wanna leave me right? But then again I can't blame him for moving b/c this town sucks big time. I wanna leave myself...But UGH! I'm so confused what to do. I mean yeah I have plenty of time to think about it. But it does feel good knowing what ur doing and it's set in stone and your not worried about it...Feel me? Exactly!

As for my other friends here...Susan and a few others..they suck booty..I recently found out they talk shat constantly behind my back. Not cool! One thing that makes me blow the heck up! LAWD! So I guess I feel now there's no meaning or anything to stay here..I mean there's a few true friends..Maybe two...that will be here for a good many years..But I feel like I have crossed twenty oceans here and there's still nothing here for me...Like a empty plate of food..I already ate what was there and I gotta go find more? Strange metaphors I know! But I'm random! You'll learn. 

Anyway..Break it down time. What I want to get out of moving is... To be myself and not care about what ppl think about me...(I'm not completely out here now) And total new surroundings! New things to do, and new ppl constantly!...I wanna find love too...So. Why wouldn't I move right? I feel as though it's the right thing to do but...Florida may not be the only place..there's one other place I could move...But IDK. Mississippii...(Fam) there..sounds fishy and more dramatic to me...BUT it's better than staying here!

So yes that was a extremly long blog for a first entry..I had a lot to get out and you had to learn about me a bit, so shsh! Don't be emo! Just comment plz and let me know what you think..I need you ppls out there to help me think about stuff that I'm not thinking about or I'm keeping a  open mind about any ideas you may want to suggest! TY SO MUCH! Leave love and a chicken leg! LOL TY for reading! <3 M SUGA