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Dating is so complicated! Gahhh!
Sugar_xxx 26
...yourself, what you want out of a relationship, w… -
Dating is so complicated! Gahhh!
Sugar_xxx 26
...would ruin things. If he really cares about you,… -
Dating is so complicated! Gahhh!
Sugar_xxx 26
Wow girl...you have such a great outlook on everyth… -
I'll eventually be okay...
Sugar_xxx 26
Oh hey! Yay! You're moving in with Danielle...awes… -
Last night was probably one of the worst night in my life...
Sugar_xxx 26
Good luck! Message me on FB if you ever need anyone…
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mashuki , 24from Moncton, N-BCommentsShow all Subscriptions (12)Statistics
Can't stop crying.. i'm scared... it's tomorrow morning[bgcolor=531218][color=E1FCF7] ___________________________________________________________________________________________  [font=wingdings]nnnnnnnnnnn n n n nnnnnnnnnnn [/font]We ourselves################[color=#e67595]|[/colot][color=#c78ca2]|[/colot][color=#a8a3ae] f[/colot][color=#88b9ba]e[/colot][color=#80abb9]e[/colot][color=#769cb6]l [/colot][color=#6d8cb4]|[/colot][color=#637db1]|[/colot] that what ######## ############we are #######doing is just a###drop####### #########in the ocean. [font=wingdings][/font] But the##### #######[color=#637db1][[/color][color=#847cab][ [/color] ocean ]] would be less ######### ######because of that ########### ###m i s s i n g##drop [font=wingdings] nnnnnnnnnnn n n n nnnnnnnnnnn Hey Guys, First i'd like to say that this journal is probably going to be passworded starting tomorrow... if you guys want the password, you'll have to kiwinote me, because i'm afraid i'll forget to kiwinote someone with the password. lol. I have a super bad memory lately... no wonder though... with everything going on... *sigh* I really like to thank each and everyone of you for taking the time to read yesterday's entry and respond... you guys have no idea what it means to me... I feel better just knowing i'm not alone in this... I hope with all my heart, that I will come on here tomorrow with good news for you guys... you guys have no idea how scared I am! Ever since I came back from school, I can't stop crying... mostly do to the fact that i'm tired, but also because i'm so scared it's something really bad... [box align=right] Entry: 04 Time: 8:50 PM Mood: tired/scared Subbies: 11 Weather: cold and windy Logins: don't know Profile Views: don't know Talking To: Ang and Phil Listening To: "Wide open spaces" Dixie Chicks Prev. 1st Responder: Sugar_xxx [color=#bb789f]I went to see Phil after school, because I needed someone to comfort me, but also because he was supposed to meet me after school, but I knew he wouldn't... because I knew he was going to be tired. So I went to see him instead.[:)] I didn't stay very long... I couldn't stop crying, and I felt like shit so I decided to go back home around 6:30. I felt bad about leaving, because I wanted to spend time with him, but I couldn't stay... I felt too much like shit. He was alright with it though... you should of seen the way he kissed me when I left, like he was never going to see me again or something. lol. I think he's as scared as me... he's like me, he always think the worst about everything... but like I told Sam today, I rather think about the worst, go there and it's nothing, than tell myself everything will be okay, and get there and it's super serious. You know?[/color] All day I tried not to think too much about it, and even now... i'm trying not to think about it too much, but it's so damn hard! Nothing bad ever happened to me before... I don't know how to react. It's crazy... Linda's coming with me at the hospital tomorrow though, probably. She said she had a class until 9:45 that she has to go to, but that she'll walk there after (the hospital is like 10-15 mins away), and i'm so glad she's coming!! Because I was thinking about it, and honestly.. I rather she comes than Phil or anyone else. Because: -she known me longer -she knows pretty much everything about me -she's a girl (lol) -she's my best friend And yeah... so i'm really glad she's coming... she has no clue how much I appreciate her coming. I hope one day she'll know... [color=#c78ca2]Well anyways... it's getting kinda late, and I want to TRY to get some sleep before tomorrow... *sigh* Just thinking about it, I feel like i'm going to throw up... please everyone pray that i'll be okay!! So scared...[:(] Love you guys[<3][/color] [color=#a8a3ae]P.S. Isn't this layout super pretty?[:)][/color] ###[color=8f7ba8][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color][font=Vivaldi][font=Papyrus][font=monotype corsiva]RaCh~x0x[/font][/font][/font][font=webdings] ggggg ng ggggg | g | g | c g ggcggggggggggggggggggggggg n | | g g | g ggggg [/font][color=#637db1]Briansgirl05: it's okay... not your fault.[:)] Thank you for taking the time to read and respond though... I really appreciate it.[:)][/color][color=#7d7cac]extreme_chaos: I have no clue what it could be either... that's what's freaking me out the most. But we'll see tomorrow I guess... and thank you for everything. You rock.[:)][/color] Eyeline_Whore: Aww thank you Karen! I really hope it's not as bad as we all think either... thanks for taking the time to read.. I really appreciate that. *hugs* [color=#b279a1]HiHeelSneakers: Yeah, I know.. I don't like taking them either. I actually didn't took any at the end... talked with my little sister and her friend for like an hour though... helped a little bit. I REALLY hope you're right and that it's nothing too bad... REALLY hoping... thank you for taking the time to read and respond... I REALLY appreciate it.[:)] Oh.. and I told you guys in my last entry in the other one, that I was starting a new one.[:)][/color] [color=#cd779b]midnite_breeze2: Awww Linda... THANKS SO MUCH!!!! *hugs* You're the best... best friend in the entire world. Even though i'm not always the greatest... but you are. Thank you for everything [<3] xoxoxox[/color] [color=#e67595]N2cj4eva14: Thanks a lot.. I hope you're right! If only it'd be something stupid like that... *sigh* Thanks a lot for taking the time to read and respond... I really appreciate it.[:)][/color] [color=#d4839d]omfgxmel: Thank you. I'll keep you posted, don't worry.[:)][/color] smile2dayalways: Awwww thank you Ashley.. you have NO IDEA how much I appreciate this!! I'll let you guys know AS SOON as I get the results.. don't worry, you'll be one of the first ones to know. *hugs* Sugar_xxx: Aww thanks! I hope so too... TheGeminiGirl: Awww thanks Sylvie!! Don't know what I'd do without you and Linda... you guys are the best friends I have ever had. And don't worry, I'll text you RIGHT AFTER I leave the hospital, okay? I'll probably see you this weekend anyway... it's okay, I know you, Phil and Colin can't be there.. I know you guys work nights. It's alright though.. I know you guys care and are behind me no matter what, and that's all that matters. Thank you *hugs* xoxoxoxo x_DieRomantic_x: Thanks hun. Thanks for talking to me on msn last night.. helped me sleep a bit. I REALLY hope you feel better... I really wish for you that he didn't had to leave, so you guys could stay together... but remember. If it's meant to be, you guys will be again down the road. I promise you that. *hugs* xoxoxo Subscribers: Briansgirl05, extreme_chaos, HiHeelSneakers, jessicasuga, major_blonde413, midnite_breeze2, N2cj4eva14, Naked__Truth, smile2dayalways, TheGeminiGirl, x_DieRomantic_x [font=webdings]ggggg ng ggggg | g | g | c g ggcggggggggggggggggggggggg n | | g g | g ggggg [/font][/color][/bgcolor]Bad news... so scared... SUBBY MUST READ!!![bg=white]
[color=black][font=wingdings]nnnn nn nnn n n nnnnn n n[/font][/color] [/bg][bg=black][box align=right][font=georgia][bgcolor=black]entry 03  08 subscribers [color=white]stats [color=white]eating-nothing [color=white]drinking-nothing [color=white]wearing-clothes [color=white]music-"Cancer" My Chemical Romance [color=white]mood-scared/tired/ect [color=white]thinking-about what it could be... [color=white]wanting-Phil to be here, or just to stop thinking about it... [color=white]05 [color=white]responders extreme_chaos major_blonde413 midnite_breeze2 N2cj4eva14 smile2dayalways [color=white]XRDX 1O/14/O6 org. idea-FuzzyLilBunny[/color] [font=georgia][color=white]Hey Guys, [bg=white]How's life? Mine's... I don't know anymore. SO scared right now... it's not even funny. I did end up not going to school, but unlike I thought I was going to do, I ended up not going at all. Because I've got bad news... from my doctor. Yup... you heard me. From my doctor... Remember my pap test last week, that she said they'd call me only if it was bad news? Well... they called. Yup. But that's not the worst part! Her secretary wanted me to go see my doctor right away (they made my little sister wake me up to answer the phone) but I couldn't go because I had no drive. She asked me atleast like 10 times in a row if i could call her back in 10 mins when I'd have a drive. And I was like "look, my dad's at work, I don't know what bus to take, i'm not even dressed or showered yet, I can't go right now". So.. she asked me if I could go to the emergency thursday morning at 9:45, because that's where my doctor will be... and I said okay. She said it was pretty serious... and i'm so scared guys! You have no idea... I have no clue what it could be, no clue... Phil is worried sick. I could tell he couldn't stopped thinking about it all day today (he stayed with me all day)... when we were on our way to get to his work, he even asked me if I could stop talking about it, because he's really scared. He says he can't stop thinking of the worst... and he's just really scared. My poor baby... I really don't like seeing him worried like that...[:(] He said that whatever it is, it won't stop him loving me, and that he's behind me 100%. So that kinda makes me feel better... but i'm still super scared. What could it be?? I really don't feel like going there alone, like you don't even get how... like seriously... my dad knows too... I can't keep anything from him. But I don't feel like going with my dad!... but it's better than going alone, I guess. I have like no one to come with me... Phil works nights, Linda has school, humm... Janie has school, Alyssa... maybe? I don't know... I don't want to go alone... I'm too scared to hear the results. *cries* Anyways, i'm going to take a couple sleeping pills to be able to sleep tonight... I have school tomorrow. I can't miss it again... can't afford to miss it again. I want to thank everyone who's actually going to read this though... thank you. [<3]RaCh~x0x[/color][/font] [color=black][font=wingdings]nnnn nn nnn n n nnnnn n n[/font][/color] [/bg]Second entry... thanks guys :)[bgcolor=black][color=DAECF4] ________________________________________________________________________________________ [color=DAECF4]  [font=webdings]ggggggggggcg n g n ggg [/font]Hold on ### [[ tight ]] ############# ##########wait for ###t o m o r r o w you'll be ########### ##################alright [font=webdings] ggg n g n gcgggggggggg [/font] [/color][color=#a9a283]Hey Guys![:)][/color] [color=#b59e84]This entry is going to be pretty short again... just want to thank each and everyone of you who cared enough to re-subby to my new journal... I very much appreciate it.[:)] Thanks so much.[/color][box align=right] entry: 02 time: 10:30 PM mood: tired profile views: don't know logins: don't know talking to: Phil listening to: tv prev. 1st responder: Briansgirl05 I'm extremely tired, so I decided not to go to class for half of the day tomorrow. I know... bad me.. I know.. I shouldn't... but TRUST ME, I need this. I need sleep... it's not even funny anymore. I'm just like a nerves ball or something... if that makes any sense at all. [color=#cd9486]Phil is here right now, and NO... it is not why i'm not going to school... I wanted to miss half the day today, but I had a huge test, so I didn't. I'm glad he's here though... I just feel like shit lately. I don't know quite why... but I just do. He makes me feel better though... so it's all good.[:)] I love him sooooo much!! Even though he's probably trying to read this right now... I can see him trying to read it from the corner of his eye. lol. He's too cute.[/color] [color=#c0a883]Well anyways, i'm off to bed... I hope everyone has a great night! love you all[<3][/color] ###[color=b59e84][font=wingdings]«[/font][/color][font=Vivaldi][font=Papyrus][font=monotype corsiva]RaCh~x0x[/font][/font][/font][font=webdings] ggg n g n gcgggggggggg || ggg | ggggggggggcg n g n ggg | ggggggggggg c g [/font][color=#c27467]Briansgirl05: Thanks girl, I really appreciate it.[:)][/color][color=#c4968f]extreme_chaos: Aww yay! Glad you re-subbied.[:)] Thank you.[/color] [color=#c6b9b8]N2cj4eva14: Thanks for re-subbying![:)][/color] [color=#c7dadf]smile2dayalways: You were one I knew you'd re-subby, because I know you really care... thanks Ashley. I really appreciate it.[:)] *hugs*[/color] Subscribers: Briansgirl05, extreme_chaos, N2cj4eva14, Naked__Truth, smile2dayalways, x_DieRomantic_x [font=webdings]ggg n g n gcgggggggggg || ggg | ggggggggggcg n g n ggg | ggggggggggg c g [/font][/color][/bgcolor]~01~ [Starting a new journal] subbies welcomed *+_ time: 7:OO PM | entry number: 1 | subby count: none yet _+* [font=Bradley hand itc]«-·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.-»[/font] [font=bradley hand itc]nobody's perfect until you fall in love with them [color=FE89B5][font=webdings][/font][/color][/font] [color=fe89b5][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color][bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor]Hey Guys! [color=FEA6C8]If you been subbied to my old journal, you knew I was going to start a new journal for personal reasons. Still not sure if i'm going to password this one yet.. we shall see. But I will surely let you guys know.[:)] Don't worry.[:)][/color] [color=FEC4DA]Anyways, I don't really have much to say, already wrote something in my old one, and I don't feel like repeating myself so... lol. Subby if you want... totally up to you.[:)][/color] I'm going to go eat something now though, haven't had supper yet so... Hope you guys have a great night take care [color=FFFFFF][<3]RaCh~x0x[/color] [bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor] [color=fe89bf][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color] [font=Bradley hand itc]«-·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.-»[/font] [font=bradley hand itc][color=FE89B5][font=webdings][/font][/color] responders[/font] [color=fe89b5][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color][bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor][smallest]none[/smallest] [bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor] [color=fe89bf][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color] [font=Bradley hand itc]«-·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.-»[/font] [font=bradley hand itc]subscribers[/font] [color=fe89b5][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color][bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor][smallest]none[/smallest] [bgcolor=fe89b5][smallest].[/smallest][/bgcolor] [color=fe89bf][font=webdings]Y[/font][/color] [font=Bradley hand itc]«-·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.·´¯`·._.-»[/font] [font=bradley hand itc]sometimes someone says something really small, and it just fits right into this empty place in your heart.[/font]
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