x0xmarix0x , 24

well it's been a really long time but seeing as im out here by myself were i know minimal people i though why not...

so i find my self in ontario again after being gone since 2009 to new-brunswick to go home were i am from,about 2 months ago i finally had enough and broke up with my boyfriend of 5 and a half years who is addicted to world of warcraft. I should have broke up with him 3 and a half years ago due to the game but i kept picking up the peices until they turned to sand,I could have never let go until i met Morgan in november and the reason im in ontario begain.

How  I met Morgan

i was randomly texting my friend pete one night end october and he randomly sends me a text saying who looks better? confused  i got 2 pictures following that,one of pete and one of a guy i had never seen before,so what did  i say,(well you pete because looks arent everything) mins you at the time  i did think Morgan was really good looking,and that was that. the next friday pete and  i went out for a beer at a pub in town and talked,it was about 11 when he looks at me and says (i need to go home im going hunting with Morgan tomorrow) at that point i decided i was gonna give Morgan a call and say i was holding pete ransom,pete gave me his number and as it rang for about a second Morgan picked up,he didnt even remeber who i was at first then clued in.we had a very short convorsation and i though nothing more of it then that.the next day he started texting me,and by that friday asked me out for a dirnk,i knew i should not have but i was misrable and liked they attention so as any girl would in this case i went,we went to the same pub i went to with pete while my boyfriend was sitting at home without me.we talked and talked and talked at what point i though he was extremely cocky ,egotistic and full of him self to the point i though to myself  i would not talk to him again,the drinks kept coming and i was getting a little drunk and the live band started to play so we decided to go somewere more quiet,we got in his big truck and drove down the road to the store grabed some chips and went out in the middle of no were, it was raining and i was freezing,we got into the rum at this point and he started talking about how body heat is the way to warm yourself up...haha yeah your a guy your gonna say something like that i though to myself,after about 5mins i was shivering so much i decided to give in i slid over and sat facing him on his lap...his arms around me i remeber feeling this feeling i had never felt before but though nothing more of it then he was a guy and he wanted to sleep with me,i normally have no probleme holding back from this kinda stuff even if i wasent getting any at home,then he says well if you take your shirt off it will warm you up faster,i dunno why i did it but i did,sitting there ontop of him,facing him with no shirt on at this point i had my head on his shoulder i looked up and we made eye contact and  i lost it,i kissed him and the rest on the night was done.

we didnt see each other till the next weekend and went out at this point to a club,i was getting ready at his house with him it felt so normal i was putting makeup on he jumped in the shower it was really wired,then when we went out this bar would always play a slow song at the end of the night he grabed my hand kissed it and led me out to the dance floor i though i was going to melt,the following week i got in the biggest fight due to that stupid game that i called pete to come pick me up and grabed my dog and left for the week,the whole week i was at petes house Morgan was there it was nice his hugs were awesome and he listened to me when i needed to talk,then i found out he was leaving for ontario in a week because there was just to much going in new-brunswick for him at this time,he asked me to come with him because  i wanted to go back to ontario anyways,i still remeber the text msg the morning he left saying last chance and me saying no because i though it was a bad idea...if i knew then what i know now,the whole month of dec we talked everyday until the 29th then all a sudden nothing,did not reply to my e-mails had his phone off,droped off the face of the earth.i remeber thinking to myself it was no big deal he was just a guy and all he wanted was sex but still it was killing me to know he was ok.march 14th the day after my birthday i got an e-mail of facebook saying (hey im sorry i have not been in contact with you heres my new number can i call you later?) my heart dropped just to know he was ok,we starting talking everyday and then i noticed the feelings i would drink i would bawl my eyes out because  i missed him i started listening to all the songs that reminded me of him i was going crazy not being around him and knew i didnt want to be with Mike anymore at this point so about 2 months ago i moved out with a friend then 2 weeks ago found myself chasing Morgan to ontario,i decided i was going to stay and get a job and we are taking things slow to see were they go and getting to know each other but even if they dont work out i will always thank him for helping me be able to break up with mike.

while the rest of my story wrights it'self i will keep you posted.

xXx Mari xXx

I need a change

a big one i need to go back to school find something i like doing because  i can't do the all center thing anymore...it sucks :(.

id like to go away to Cuba in 2012 i need a vaca like that.

well dont have much to say today maybe it will come tomorrow

XxX Mari

heya its been a really long time...

well im gonna start writing again because my anxiety is killing me lately so im sure this will help me out seeing as i dont really have anyone else to listen...i started a new job saturday i like it so far its in an elderly home its not bad. well dont have much to say for today will check back in tomorrow.

xxxx Mari